Enumclaw Omnium

By Ian Mensher,

TT: The usual suspects were there, which by now includes every semi, quasi and full time pro Canadia apparently has to offer. Routley crushed the TT, where the times were way up from years past. A quick survey showed that top 20 times this year would have been more like top 5 ones in years past where the weather was dry. Jamie rolled a sweet 13:04 which put him in 5th position. I was 13:27 and in 17th. Colin rolled a 15 something without aero equipment and beat Heather to secure his manhood. The weather was hot and dry and made for a good race.

Crit: After eating mounds of "scramble" at the Kettle, we sat in the shade to watch hordes of racers go by. The masters race featured some sweet action as Gallagher was on the prowl to defend his TT win. In typical fashion, he pushed his luck and ended up in the beauty bark on the second to last turn (mostly unscathed) and Gary Brown took the sprint. Our race was decidedly fast. Jamie prowled the front, took a few primes and got in one of the few breaks of the race. I stayed out of trouble with Colin in the middle, avoiding one Canadian who decided to test out whether he could clip his pedal on the ground while going straight. Turns out you can!! Took a free lap and ended up getting put in between the solo leader and the pack (Phil Miller wasn't there...). So I stayed up at the front of the group and tried for one overall point prime, only to effectively lead out Routley, who took it easily. I hurt good after that and sat in while Jamie took on the front. In the end the Canadian hockey-style of riding resulted in so-so results. On the one hand Jamie got curbed by an H&R block guy who went from far left to far right (e.g., the CURB) and took Jamie out of the top 5 with one lap to go. On the other hand, I was feeling less confident that the chopping and corner diving wouldn't result in my death and thus backed off a little more than I should have in the final lap. I sprinted for 13th and the few points I could get. Colin was comfortably in the field and looked smooth as usual.

RR: This was a fast race. We got off to some attacks before the climb and a few groups formed and we pulled back. Finally about 4 guys got off and we let them get about 45 seconds or so. The first of five assaults on the hill was hard, but things stayed mostly together. Everyone pretty much regrouped after the hill and we kept the break in sight. KOM points went 2 deep for the overall and so that motivated a few guys to go hard even though they seemed to fail to realize there were dudes up the road taking the points. Up the hill the second time we sort of hit insanity pace and it hurt hard to stay up in the front. Everything seemed to regroup pretty well, but I think we lost Colin at this point. He did return back up the hill, riding with DJ MC Rob Campbell, who had the misfortune of having his lip stung by a bee. In the flats before the third climb, we let Herriot, a Red Truck (Rob Britton)and an H&R guy roll off. We pretty much sat up and they got a 3 minute gap quickly. The pace up the hill was much more mellow, which allowed me to express my distaste for the constant wheel chopping and hockey-style racing that Red Truck et al was showing us. They'd just fuck with you to hold a wheel about 20 guys back from the front, making little furtive darts here and there like they'd take your front wheel out if you weren't careful. So up the hill I started to yell at various americans to start chopping wheels and for god's sake, get the good position. It ended in Jamie yelling some more chopping encouragement and me fake "skeet skeet skeeting" (see Chapelle Show) in lil' Steve Fischer's face (sorry Steve). The H&R guy got dropped the fourth time up the hill, I think, but Herriot and Britton were solidly in the lead. H&R tried to do some work, but didn't have much power. The fourth time up was hard, but not miserable. Leadign up to the fifth I got in a move that I thought could play out, but it was a no-go. The climb was a tough one and 6 guys slipped off in the last little pitch. We pulled all together on the upper section and headed down hill. Jamie did a fucking rad job of staying up at the front with me glued on his wheel. We were top 5 or so coming into the turn, which put us 1 k from the straight finish. Kenny ramped it up and then two red truck guys darted out, which prompted Jamie's immediate response to hop on the wheel. From 250 m out, Jamie was full throttle. I put on zee afterburners and realized I had a ridiculously sweet gap with about 50m to go, which was good because an SUV was driving at 5mph in the right hand lane. Photos on Amara's sight capture Jamie going across the line just behind Richter and a Red Truck ( http://www.wheelsinfocus.com/2009/Enumclaw/RR/P12/pages/94AD7327esr.htm) . The photo is great because it hides the fact that both of Jamie's legs were completely seized from his superhuman effort and because it shows the faces of the spectators who are freaking out about the SUV. So I took 9th and Jamie was 12th, which put Jamie in 12th overall and me in 13th. Not a bad result given the stiff competition, heat, and overabundance of testosterone in the competition.

So that's my story. We drank beer afterwards....